Workshops and intensives
For people who have spent a life being what others needed.
You are the capable one. The one who handles it. Everybody relies on you and almost nobody asks how you are, and at some point you stopped expecting them to.
This is for you if
- You can say what everyone else needs and go blank on your own
- You apologize reflexively, including to furniture
- You have been the strong one since you were a child
- The idea of asking for something makes you physically uncomfortable
This is not about becoming harder
People arrive braced for a workshop that will teach them to be tougher, or to say no in a firm voice while feeling exactly as guilty as before. That is a performance layered over the same belief. It does not hold, and it makes warm people into brittle ones.
Where it actually comes from
Almost always a moment where being useful was the safest available option, and it worked. That conclusion is decades old and has never been reviewed. Reach it and the behavior stops needing to be managed, because it stops being load-bearing.
What changes
People describe it as taking up their own space without having to brace for it. The saying no is the smallest part. The bigger part is that the guilt that used to arrive afterwards does not.
Format
Two and a half to five days in a small group, or one to one as a private intensive.
You have been strong for everyone else for a long time. That is not the same as being free.
Start with a free 15 minute call
We talk, you ask questions, and you decide if this is right for you. No pressure either way.