Walnut Creek, California
It is finished. Now you have to work out who you are.
Everyone congratulated you on getting through it, and then went back to their lives. Nobody warned you that the hard part starts after the paperwork, in a quiet house, on an ordinary Tuesday.
This might be you if
- You do not know what you like any more, only what they liked
- You are furious and also relieved and also grieving
- You are worried you have wasted years
- You cannot imagine trusting your own judgement about a person again
Two jobs, and they are different
One is clearing what happened, so the memory of it stops running your reflexes. The other is building what is next, which is practical, forward facing and honestly rather more interesting. Trying to do the second while the first is still loud is why so many people stall here.
About the wasted years
This is usually the sentence that is doing the most damage, and it is worth taking apart rather than reassuring away. It is also frequently the thing carrying the most charge, which means it is workable directly.
Rebuilding on your terms
Not the person you were before them, that person does not exist any more. Who you are now, with everything you learned, which is a great deal. I have watched people build the best decade of their life from exactly this starting point, and I did it myself.
How I would work with this
The years were not wasted. You just have not been shown what you got out of them yet.
Start with a free 15 minute call
We talk, you ask questions, and you decide if this is right for you. No pressure either way.